How to ignore negative people. How to protect yourself from negativity and strengthen your energy. Stick to daily rituals
How to stop reacting to other people's actions
Good time. We can control all our senses. Do you know how to stop paying attention to the opinions of others? If someone tries to offend us, we have a chance to choose what our reaction will be. Don't get mad at the other person because they did something bad. Try to be calm. This article describes how to achieve this.
Always remember that other people do things that are not related to you. Each person only projects his inner world into objective reality.
Some people feel, talk, think. Others accept all this information.
1. How to see it?
If you understand that your actions are not related to other people, it will be easier for you to realize the idea that was described above.
For example, if you feel good, but someone around you is sad, you will still think positively. You may not even notice that the person next to you is feeling bad. Now imagine that you are sad, and there is a very happy person next to you. You will be angry with him. Perhaps you will try to spoil his mood, even if he is good. This is due to the fact that you feel bad.
In these two cases, you are projecting your state onto another person, although your initial mood has nothing to do with it.
If you obsess over people who feel the opposite way, it will be difficult for you to ignore them.
This idea does not exclude the possibility that some people can abuse your psychological habit. Perhaps they will provoke you to aggression. But most people do not have this goal. They just say what they think. And you need to disengage from their feelings.
Nobody can control you. There is no person who can change your perception. Your brain is in your territory.
Your inner world is made up of experiences that you have accumulated all your life. It allows you to look at society from a certain angle. You take in all the information that comes into your head and interpret it to fit your beliefs. Other people have nothing to do with this process at all. Habits, behavior, criticism, pain are controlled by your consciousness. It's all just a projection of your inner world. If someone else provokes you, you can remain calm.
2. Good news
If you understand this theory, you can improve your life. If you hurt another person, it is not their fault. You can say that someone deserved punishment, but they only deserved it in your inner world. You have control over your mind, you must use this property.
3. Destroy the cycle
We live in a very reactionary world. One person says something and the other immediately reacts. There is a cycle that leads to sad consequences. More and more people are participating in this system. Something very bad might happen.
If you see that someone provokes you to aggression, do not respond to him in the same way. Just ignore this person and mind your own business. You will save your time if you don't let it influence you.
Of course, this cannot be applied to certain situations in which you must protect yourself or someone close to you.
4. Practice
The next time someone starts yelling at you, stay calm. If you start screaming back, things will only get worse. But if you answer in a calm tone, this person will become a little ashamed. You will immediately see how quickly he will switch to normal communication. Maybe he'll just leave.
Now you know 4 ways to react to others and be calm at the same time. Share them with your friends, practice them in your life and watch how it changes. Success in training! See you in the next article.
Each inhabitant of the planet, as a social being, performs many of his actions with an eye on other members of the society where he lives: whether it will harm them, whether it will cause them discontent. Some make such a reconciliation of public opinion only occasionally, others are not able to fully exist without the approval of others. For them, the problem of how not to pay attention to people broadcasting exclusively discontent and negativity, subjecting every act to merciless criticism or striking with their own stupidity, but not getting tired of being imposed on it, is an urgent problem. To correct the situation will help following some advice from psychologists.
How to Ignore People's Opinions: Boosting Self-Esteem
Difficulties learning to ignore people are usually the result of low self-esteem. Why it is underestimated is the second question. Often this style of behavior and inadequate assessment of one's own personality comes from childhood. Significant adults sometimes, when raising a young member of society, do not even notice that they are breaking him, humiliating his personal dignity, convincing him that they are of no value. If this happens for years, and the character of the child is a priori not too strong, he develops serious psychological complexes on the basis of such negativity. To eradicate them, you will have to work on increasing self-esteem. Auto-trainings, analysis of one's own talents and merits, their development and application in practice will help here.
How to Ignore Negative People: Setting Psychological Boundaries
Often, those who are overly dependent on social evaluation simply violate psychological boundaries. They unwittingly give others the right to criticize every aspect of their own lives, down to personal preferences. A person who pays attention to such trifles runs the risk of losing his own individuality, turning into a shadow of public opinion. To begin with, he needs to ask himself the question of Chatsky: who is judging him? Are perfect beings devoid of flaws? It is necessary to decide whom and to what extent he is ready to let himself in. Stop any attempts by outsiders to speak out on issues that should not worry them, because they are too personal.
How to ignore unpleasant people: knowing yourself and cutting off unconstructive judgments
To eliminate dependence on other people's assessments, you will have to thoroughly work on yourself. First you need to learn to separate the personal from the imposed from the outside. We will have to analyze what our own desires are, what the soul aspires to. Make a plan to achieve those goals. Cut off those aspirations that are manifested due to the requirements of parents or others around and contradict personal needs. Asking the question of how one can ignore a person who bears condemnation, one must be clearly aware that benevolence is not always driven by outsiders in such statements. Some are guided by envy, the desire to humiliate. If someone is pouring negativity simply out of a desire to criticize, it makes sense to ignore his words.
How to Ignore Stupid People: No Touchiness
Anyone who is offended by someone else's criticism only makes things worse for themselves. This does not bring negative feelings to the offenders, and some of them - with troll inclinations - will rejoice at the deterioration in the mood of the one who was poured with emotional slop. There are several options for productive actions on how to ignore a harmful person:
- Ignoring, reducing contacts with unpleasant personalities to a minimum.
- Communicating with those who are unpleasant, exclusively on issues that cannot be avoided, not allowing them to be personal.
- Unwillingness to enter into disputes, especially with narrow-minded individuals. The advice of the great Mark Twain will come in handy here: you should not argue with an idiot, because then you get into his territory, and there he will crush you with his own experience.
- Internal readiness for the adverse consequences of some of their actions, because only the one who is inactive does not make mistakes.
- Lack of regular recovery in the memory of other people's non-constructive statements. This does not mean that a person has ceased to pay attention to himself and his own shortcomings. Only constructive criticism should be taken into account.
How to ignore the rudeness of people: humor to help
It is not easy to resist the outright rudeness of outsiders. Educated individuals from this sometimes fall into a stupor. Some have a desire to repay the same, no less rudely speaking out in response. It is impossible to allow such actions, because this is what the boor often achieves, trying to unbalance the other, and then point him to imperfection.
It makes sense to use such experience for hardening one's own character, educating strong-willed qualities. Other people's negativity should be treated approximately the way people paid attention to mold - the history of the invention of antibiotics that saved many lives. In other words, try to extract something useful for yourself from negative situations. Since it is still necessary to fight back against a boor, it is desirable to use directness and humor for such purposes. A good example of this is the situation that arose in public transport with one resourceful woman. She was sent along a route known to many by a former drunk citizen. She replied that she was there more often than this character was sober.
Instruction
Remember that working on yourself is not only about stopping overreacting to external stimuli, but also about how to find a way to throw out the accumulated negative emotions. Otherwise, repressed feelings will result in severe stress for you. Do not allow negative impressions to accumulate inside you.
Try to relate to what is happening a little more cheerfully, with a share of humor. Surely, in some situations, you can not boil, but give a discharge to emotions through laughter. A joke will save you from an irritable state and will not let circumstances unsettle you. Look at the situation from the outside. Find something funny about the way things have turned out. Draw an analogy with some comedy.
Don't exaggerate what happened to you. Look at the situation in a global sense. Surely this episode will not entail serious consequences for your life and health. Therefore, there is no reason to react so strongly to him. Think about the fact that you undermine your health by wasting your nerves on nothing. Imagine if what happened will matter to you in a few years. Perhaps this will help you to restrain yourself.
Control your emotions at least in order not to look ugly in the eyes of others. A person who can be pissed off by any trifle causes pity or laughter. Some people may not understand your emotionality and find your behavior inadequate. Think about how it can hurt your personal life and career. After all, some individuals will turn away from an unbalanced personality.
Watch your mood. If you remember all the good things that have happened to you lately, and are generally satisfied with your life, you will not be able to piss off the little things. Therefore, excessive irritability should be considered as a signal that you are not all right. You may be experiencing a personal crisis. Maybe unresolved issues put pressure on you and make you nervous about everything. Put things in order in your head and life. Stay positive and don't let yourself get carried away.
Sometimes other people act as irritants. It can be relatives, friends or colleagues. Think about what exactly you do not like about this or that individual and why. Next, you should recognize that a person has a right to his own character and his shortcomings, and your opinion is not the final authority. Think about whether you yourself are annoying someone. Cultivate tolerance. Remember that people around you probably have reasons to do this, and not otherwise. If you understand that someone is hurting you on purpose, limit communication with this person or be able to fight back in the form of the same teasing of an opponent.
1. Change your body language
Pay attention to your body when you are overwhelmed by negative emotions. Look at your face: the corners of your mouth are lowered, your forehead is furrowed. How do you keep your back? Are you slouching?
If you have a hotbed of negative thoughts in your head, your body behaves accordingly. And when such thoughts become constant, it gets used to such a situation. You have probably seen people with a mask of contempt or anger on their face, which persists in any situation.
This also works in the opposite direction: the clamped position of the body and the frowning face do not create the best mood. So your first step in getting rid of bad thoughts is to change your posture and facial expressions. Straighten your back and straighten your shoulders. Feel where tension has accumulated in your body, and relax, smile. Within a few moments you will feel that the emotional background is changing.
2. Discuss your feelings
Some people tell everyone about their problems and even savor it. Others keep everything in themselves to the last, and then get a nervous breakdown.
If you still have some negative emotions that do not go away, try to tell your loved ones about it. By putting into words, you give shape to emotions and put them into perspective. After the conversation, you will be surprised how stupid it was to worry about the voiced occasion, and the negative will disappear.
3. Stop the flow of thoughts
If a thousand thoughts rush through your head in one minute, it is difficult to decide something for yourself and somehow control it. If you are stuck on the negative, try not to think about anything at all for just one minute. By paying attention to what is happening in your head and what thoughts dominate there, you can change the situation.
4. Change the wording
It is amazing how much the tone of a whole phrase or thought changes from a slight change in wording. Compare: "I'm going through a difficult period in my life, I have problems" and "I'm going through a period of changes in my life, I'm looking for better solutions." The underlying data hasn't changed, just the problems have been called changes. But who's to say it's not true?
5. Get creative
When negative thoughts attack you, you can spend some time getting creative. It works just like a conversation, with the exception that you don't have to annoy anyone with your problems. You can do anything: write prose or poetry, draw with a pencil or paint. , finally.
A splash of emotions through creativity is a kind of art therapy that will not only provide relaxation, but also cheer you up. Negative thoughts will pass through you, take shape, and stay there, not in your head.
6. Take a walk
It often seems that our own head is the only source of negativity. Most often this is the case, but it also happens differently. If you are surrounded by toxic people, such as in a family where everyone is constantly arguing and blaming each other, or at work, where everyone is on their nerves, half of the negativity may be due to their mood.
If you are not a guru, it is unlikely that you will be able to get rid of heavy thoughts while being in such an environment. Therefore, if possible, leave it to calm down. Go for a walk or go somewhere: to an exhibition, to your favorite cafe, to the cinema - this will help you find.
7. Make a Thank You List
Sometimes we forget about all the good things in our lives. It seems that there is no way out and a complete failure on all fronts. So, sitting in a cozy and warm apartment, having come from a favorite job, a person may think that his life is a cesspool, and he is a complete loser. And all because of the coincidence of minor troubles for the day or an unfulfilled project hanging over the soul.
To cope with this state, write down all the good things that are in your life, what you are for. For example: “I am grateful for my appearance and health”, “I am grateful for loving and beloved relatives”, “I am grateful for true friends”.
Look at the resulting list and see for yourself: minor annoyances cannot outweigh this.
