Engage in depression. What really happens to your body when you are depressed? Improving external living conditions

Diet for depression is an important part of the treatment of this mental illness, as its menu contains many products that increase mood and tone.

Depression is a psychological disorder characterized by depressed mood, persistent fatigue, pessimistic outlooks, decreased sex drive, anger, panic, and crying for no reason.

Most often, depression occurs against a background of serious physical illness, loss of a loved one, problems in personal life, job loss, childbirth, rape, or with a hereditary predisposition. Also, the depressive state is often exacerbated in spring and autumn, without significant reasons for this.

Do you need a diet for depression?

Psychotherapists do not always prescribe a therapeutic diet for depression in addition to antidepressants, but it is scientifically proven that foods containing amino acids, zinc, dopamine and vitamins can improve brain function and increase levels of serotonin, the hormone of happiness.

• Dates, almonds, peanuts;
• Bananas, cheese;
• Beans, seeds;
• Fish, dairy products;
• Soya beans;
• Wheat sprouts;
• Brown rice;
• Eggs;
• Meat;
• Cereals;
• Seafood;
• Mushrooms;
• Radish;
• Asparagus;
• Vegetables and fruits.

Very often people, while observing medical nutrition in depressive conditions, are drawn to sweets: they want to eat ice cream, chocolate, etc. In this case, you should observe the measure and consume no more than one chocolate bar per day per day.

Caffeine lovers should get rid of the habit of drinking coffee regularly. it only aggravates the condition. The same applies to those who have bad habits: smoking and drinking alcohol only create a feeling of calmness for a while, but then the mood can significantly deteriorate, because alcohol and cigarettes are harmful to the body.

The use of an effective diet for depressive disorders, together with the use of medications prescribed by a doctor, gives positive results if, in addition to sweets, you limit the use of fried and too fatty foods.

Diet for depression: menu and features of medical nutrition ^

Diet for depression: medical menu, recipes

Nutrition rules for depression:

• It is recommended to eat 5 times a day: 4 times to eat more densely, and before going to bed, drink tea, broth or kefir;
• Use more fruit on the menu, and the diet itself can last no more than two weeks.

Diet for depression: menu

Most often, for depressive disorders, this version of the sample menu is used:

• We have breakfast of salads from fruits and nuts, we drink tea with a piece of chocolate;
• We have lunch with tomato and cheese salad, we eat a banana;
• Have an afternoon tea with the addition of jam;
• 1 hour before bedtime, we drink an infusion of St. John's wort.

Spring depression diet

In the spring, it is best to use an example of this menu:

• In the morning we eat oatmeal in milk and an orange. Drinking tea;
• We eat grapefruit for lunch;
• We have lunch with bean soup and yogurt;
• We eat a banana for an afternoon snack;
• We have dinner with baked chicken with garlic sauce and steamed broccoli.

Diet for autumn depression

• For breakfast we eat scrambled eggs, we drink coffee with bread;
• Snack on a baked apple;
• We have lunch with vegetable salad, baked chicken and juice;
• Have an afternoon snack with cottage cheese with the addition of berries;
• We have dinner with fish baked with vegetables, we drink tea.

Diet for postpartum depression

After giving birth, young mothers very often experience anxiety and depression. You can successfully fight this, and at the same time increase the baby's immunity when breastfeeding, using the following menu:

• In the morning we eat oatmeal with fruit, we drink tea with a diet flat cake;
• For lunch we eat fruit salad, drink juice;
• We have lunch with bean soup, vegetable salad and a piece of sturgeon;
• Have an afternoon snack with fruit smoothies or yogurt;
• For dinner we cook steamed cutlets and pilaf.

Diet for depression in children

Children are depressed for the same reasons as adults, but in this case it is necessary to include in the diet as much fruit and protein as possible:

• We have breakfast with boiled eggs, yogurt and tea;
• For lunch we eat apples;
• We have lunch with meat soup, fruit salad. We wash it down with orange juice;
• For an afternoon snack, we eat yogurt with a banana;
• We have dinner with seafood salad, cutlets and tea.

Chocolate diet for depression

The essence of this method is that you need to eat up to 80 g of any chocolate per day, but preferably black. You can eat from this menu:

• In the morning we eat cottage cheese casserole, we drink tea;
• For lunch we eat 40 g of chocolate;
• We have lunch with seafood soup, salad and juice;
• For an afternoon snack, we drink tea with 40 g of chocolate;
• We have dinner with a vegetable salad and a piece of jellied fish.

Color Diet Down with Autumn Depression

The main principle of this technique is the use of foods of a certain color on specific days:

• Day 1: eat only red vegetables, berries, fruits and fish;
• Day 2: eat orange food: carrots, oranges, grapefruit, tangerines, peppers;
• Day 3: eat fruits, vegetables and yellow berries;
• Day 4: switch to green;
• Day 5: blue;
• Day 6: eat blue foods;
• Day 7: Finish in purple.

Diet to prevent depression

To prevent depression, it is recommended to drink a decoction of St. John's wort, consume more vitamins and foods containing folic acid:

• We have breakfast with milk oatmeal with pineapples or bananas, we have a cup of tea;
• For lunch we eat fresh or baked apples;
• We have lunch with fish soup and seafood salad;
• Have an afternoon snack with fruit yogurt;
• We have supper with mashed potatoes, cutlets and St. John's wort broth.

Diet for depression: recipes

Seafood salad recipe

• We wash and clean 1 kg of mussels, boil them in boiling water. Cool down, remove the fringe and antennae, choose the right meat;
• Chop onions, tomatoes, red peppers, olives, basil, parsley, garlic;
• Mix the garlic with olive oil, spices and salt;
• Stir all the ingredients, pour with lemon juice.

Fish soup recipe

• We wash and clean the carp, gut and cut into pieces;
• We cook broth from bones, head and skin, add bay leaf to it;
• Cut the fillets into pieces, salt and put in the refrigerator;
• When the broth is ready, filter it, add chopped peppers and tomatoes;
• Cook for half an hour;
• Twist it in a blender, then set it to cook again, add fillet and paprika;
• After 10 minutes, remove from the stove.

Fruit smoothie recipe

• Cut the avocado pulp into pieces, do the same with the peeled kiwi;
• Put in a blender, beat;
• Pour in yogurt and twist again.

As a result of a diet for depression, it is possible to achieve an increase in mood, since the body receives the substances it lacks for this.

Tips on how to avoid worsening depression:

• Do not drink coffee, quit bad habits;
• Plan in advance the schedule of important things for the day;
• Incorporate mood-enhancing foods into your diet;
• Visit the pool;
• Take warm baths daily with soothing aromatic salt;
• Keep a diary in which to record joyful events for several days: in the future, this will help to look at life in a new way;
• Engage in meditation;
• Take antidepressants under the supervision of a physician.

We continue the series of articles devoted to this "evil" and unpleasant state of mind - depression.

This article highlights some of the common misconceptions about depression. Contains some tips on how to get out of depression, tells how to develop a positive mindset. Hormonal changes in depression are described and six tips for getting out of it are given.

Sometimes it seems that the day has gone very badly. The tights were torn, the coffee ran away, the son stained his new shirt. Moreover, a sad face is looking at you from the mirror. I want to indulge in gloomy thoughts, burying my face in the pillow. Could it be depression? Most likely, this is just a bad mood, but it can develop into a real illness if you let him do it.

Common misconceptions about depression

A separate article on the topic ""

Some people believe that depression occurs after a major shock. But, if a person has a tendency to depression, the disease can appear without any shock, due to a minor problem, such as rudeness in a minibus or the loss of a wallet.

Another misconception is that a joyful event does not cause depression. For example, the birth of a child may be accompanied by a depressive state. There is a term "postpartum depression". This condition occurs against the background of hormonal changes as a result of childbirth. This type of depression can disappear without a trace when hormonal levels return to normal.

Another misconception is that depression heals on its own. It is almost impossible to get out of severe depression. Medication should be prescribed by an experienced specialist. The drugs that helped your friend when her husband left her won't always help you. Self-medication can significantly worsen the situation.

Anyone who believes that depression can only be in adults is mistaken. Children are also susceptible to this disease. And we are not talking about adolescents, when hormonal changes occur in the body. Even young children become depressed, which is expressed in unjustified aggression or lethargy, loss of interest in playing or studying, decreased appetite, and melancholic facial expressions.

Men are also prone to depression. Although the representatives of the stronger sex do not talk about their problems and try to overcome the disease on their own. In such a period, men are characterized by uncertainty, someone begins to abuse alcohol, and someone plunges into work or begins to give preference to extreme sports.

How to get out of depression?

For starters, be more optimistic and believe in yourself.

Negative thinking, according to experts, can play a key role in the development of depression. Of course, factors that do not depend on a person can also influence. But being optimistic helps a lot. Try to overcome negative thinking with positive.

For example, if you consider yourself a nonentity, incapable of anything, doing everything wrong, drive this thought away. She indicates low self-esteem and maximalism, when achievements are understated, or not noticed, and the negative is exaggerated. If you accidentally overcook the cutlets, do not think that you are a bad housewife. Find the positive and praise yourself for it. After all, you can do a lot very well, but today you can buy cutlets in the store.

If the thought stuck in your head that you are always late, everything falls out of your hands, you forget everything. Try not to generalize. The words "always" and "never" are not often used in life. Try to remember when you showed enviable punctuality, did not drop something of value and did not forget anything. There will probably be many such cases. If you “always” and “everything” broke, there would be no dishes left in the house!

You blame yourself that your son got a bad grade and your husband was late for an important meeting because of you. You think that it was your fault that the phone was turned off, etc. Of course, not so little depends on us, but why blame yourself for everything that happens in your family, your husband's at work, or around the world? If you can do something, do it, but you shouldn't take responsibility for someone's mistake.

Another thought that plunges us into despondency when you think that you should have done differently. You replay the situation in your head over and over again and try to find the perfect solution, but you cannot change anything. Even if you really did not act wisely and you have to reap the bitter consequences, repeatedly returning to the past in order to reproach yourself will increase negative emotions. Try to think positively. You may have been wrong, but how do you know what would have happened if you had acted differently? Or maybe you did the only right way? Can we draw a conclusion for the future, learn a lesson for ourselves?

If you still find it difficult to develop a positive mindset, remember someone who is always optimistic and try to consider the issue from the point of view of that optimist. What would he do in your situation?

Depression test or specialist diagnosis.

In order to start treating depression, you need to at least make sure you have it. Indeed, often what is called depression in everyday life has little to do with a truly medical problem (diagnosis). For this, there are special tests for detecting depression, clinical questionnaires, methods. Analysis of complaints and problems that led to such a state becomes important. You can read more about this, take a depression test, find out what to do and where to go, as well as get recommendations on how to solve your particular problem in a special one on our portal.

What happens in the body during depression.

When a person is depressed, hormonal disruption occurs: cortisone levels rise, and serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine levels fall. As a result, a person's appetite disappears, insomnia appears, interest in life is lost, thoughts of suicide may appear, a decrease in sexual desire occurs, and there may be indigestion. Depression can be confused with diseases of the liver, heart, or spine. Misdiagnosis can lead to futile and endless visits to doctors.

What to do at the first symptoms of depression

According to the conclusions of doctors, it is necessary to force the disease to surrender its positions with a massive attack.

1. Use natural antidepressants: bananas, apple pie, pasta. These foods are rich in tryptophan, which is converted to serotonin. This important hormone is responsible for good mood, satisfaction and tension.

2. Exercise for relaxation has a positive effect. You should not lie down and turn off your thoughts, it is better to do dynamic exercises, for example, swing your arms. Dynamic exercise promotes the production of serotonin.

3. Aromatherapy helps a lot. A hot bath with a few drops of essential oil or other soothing and relaxing ingredients such as lavender, basil, cedar, chamomile, or lemon balm will come in handy.

4. Even half an hour of walking in the warm rays of the sun increases the production of serotonin in the body. Do not miss the opportunity to absorb the energy of the sun.

5. Vigorous sports such as tennis, jogging, aerobics or even dancing will lower levels of cortisone, the stress hormone, and increase the production of the pleasure and happiness hormone endorphin.

6. Eating greens and B vitamins contributes to the normalization of the nervous system. But the use of milk, sugar, eggs, flour products, oranges and foods with preservatives and flavors increase irritability.

These recommendations are general, so to speak, auxiliary. The main emphasis in depressive conditions will still be directed to working with a specialist in the field of mental state and health - a psychologist, psychiatrist or psychotherapist. Do not self-medicate under any circumstances!

Check out other articles on depression:

For many people, depression is literally unsettling. You turn into a person who is not fond of the white light, suffer from pain and unbearable hopelessness and dream that the black streak will end faster. However, sadness, lack of motivation and lack of interest in life are just the tip of the iceberg, but if you dig a little deeper, you can see unexpected physiological symptoms of this ailment. This is what happens to your body when you are depressed.

Fatigue

From time to time, the feeling of burnout from work is inherent in all of us. This is not surprising if you have a quarterly report or defense of an important project on your nose. But if fatigue prevents you from working even when you are not busy with work and observe the daily routine, this may indicate chronic depression or major depressive disorder. At the same time, you experience a breakdown associated with physical exhaustion and a decrease in energy levels. Most often, these symptoms are exacerbated after trying to solve a problem and indicate a clear dissonance between the mental and physical bodies.

Pain

Along with chronic fatigue, physical pain, including of unknown origin, is another clear sign of depression. Constant stress creates tension in the muscles of the body. And if some people feel discomfort in the neck, back or joints, others feel tightness in the chest, which can cause unconscious breath holding. According to experts, the most common type of pain in depression is pain along the spine, such as in the lower back. Muscle tension negatively affects your posture, your shoulders automatically move forward, your back slouches, and your head is constantly down. All of this further damages your self-esteem.

Migraine

Tension in the body also provokes other types of pain, such as migraines. Depression interferes with the production of neurotransmitters and neurohormones, which in the long term negatively affects the normal functions of several body systems. Scientists have established a strong relationship between depression and migraines that works both ways. For example, having chronic headaches puts you at risk for developing a depressive disorder. Also, these two ailments have related roots in the form of a genetic predisposition or exposure to environmental factors.

Sleep problems

Insomnia is considered to be a scourge of productivity and a cause of stress. However, other sleep disorders also negatively impact your mental well-being. Pay attention if you experience fatigue or sleepiness during the day. Alarm bells can be sudden awakenings in the middle of the night or in the morning, accompanied by unmotivated melancholy. Here are the signs of clinical depression that can be confirmed or refuted by a mental health expert.

Digestive disorders

Gastrointestinal problems are also common in people with depression or anxiety disorder (especially in the children and adolescents category). Do not ignore digestive disorders in schoolchildren if they develop against the background of poor academic performance, as well as conflicts with teachers or peers. And if nausea or diarrhea can be caused by depression, then chronic digestive disorders (Crohn's disease) can only be exacerbated by an anxiety disorder.

Brain fog

When you are overwhelmed with work, household chores, parenting and family conflicts, there comes a moment when you feel mentally exhausted. This often leads to forgetfulness and inability to concentrate on ordinary affairs, which in the scientific field is called cloudy consciousness or fog in the head. Sometimes all you need to continue your normal activities is a little rest or a change of scenery. This puts your head in order and gives you the opportunity to accumulate strength for new achievements. Rest is not always omnipotent, however, so if the clouding of consciousness continues on an ongoing basis, it may indicate depression. In this case, only a psychotherapist will help determine the possible causes of the disease and develop a strategy for the complete or partial elimination of symptoms.

Changes in the menstrual cycle

Irregular periods in women depend on a number of factors, including oral contraceptive use, nervousness, or stress. Scientific studies have found a correlation between depression and changes in the menstrual cycle (pain, duration, and consistency). Other sources suggest that having a painful period only aggravates the symptoms of a depressive disorder. In 2005, a study was conducted, according to which 64 percent of women with clinical depression reported that symptoms of the disease worsen 5-10 days before menstruation.

Diabetes

According to the Mayo Clinic, people with depressive disorder are at a higher risk of diabetes. Again, this relationship works both ways. Thus, patients with type 2 diabetes have a higher chance of developing mental illness. Other side effects of depression and anxiety disorder are fatigue and poor diet (overeating, cravings for fatty or sugary foods). All this leads to an increase in body weight - a serious factor that directly affects the onset of diabetes mellitus. On the other hand, elevated blood glucose levels can weaken the body's immune system, further exacerbating symptoms of depression.

Jared Hitman, a Houston-based narcologist, says depression contributes to weight gain in several ways. Anxiety disorder triggers the release of the stress hormone cortisol, which in turn triggers the release of insulin. This hormone regulates carbohydrate metabolism in the body, and its excess is responsible for the irresistible craving for sweets (getting fast energy). In addition to this factor, food cravings can be seen as a kind of moral compensation or an acquired skill of survival in the fight against constant sadness and sadness.

There are moments in a person's life when he is depressed, depressed by the piled up problems and worries. He is constantly in a bad mood, there is no desire to continue or complete the work he has begun, there is no satisfaction from the previous joys, a feeling of his own uselessness and uselessness appears. This behavior indicates depression. Depression cannot be simply waited out or worried about. It is necessary to start treatment in a timely manner in order to feel the fullness of life again.

How to deal with depression?

Sometimes depression can be caused by a single event, such as the death of a loved one. But as time goes on, the brain and senses adjust to life with traumatic memories. After a difficult period, life is gradually filled with new events and colors. But it doesn't always work out the way we expect it to. It happens that the experience of grief or stress triggers depression or exacerbates its course. Recently, depression has often been diagnosed as a chronic illness or condition.

Most often, people with an unstable and unstable psyche are exposed to depression. Treatment for depression is primarily aimed at acquiring and strengthening mental immunity. Medications, such as antidepressants, can partially help with this (for more details in our article -), but without an integrated approach to getting rid of the causes of the disease, it will be difficult, since the risk of relapse is high!

It should be noted that there is no single scheme for getting rid of depression. The success of treatment depends on the severity, form and duration of the disease. However, there are a few general rules and actions that can help relieve depression and improve depressed mood:

Physical exercise

Sport promotes the production of positive hormones and replaces the dose of antidepressants. The main rule is that sports should not be violence against oneself! There are endless types of physical activity in the world. If you feel sad at the thought that sports are running, gym and intense training, relax! Think about what you like. What could you enjoy in spite of the tiredness? It can be dancing or horseback riding. Do you like peace? Yoga and Pilates perfectly complement a relaxed lifestyle. Water skiing, hiking in the mountains for beautiful landscapes, cycling and even jumping on a trampoline - whatever you like. Depression is characterized by persistent negative thoughts, and sports are the best way to get rid of them. It completely occupies the consciousness of a person, and he does not have time to think about the bad, it can even be called a kind of deception for the brain.

Internal state control

This is one of the most difficult rules to follow in treating depression. Depression is filled with feelings such as anger, sadness, irritation, or jealousy. All these emotions poison the person and make him even more susceptible to depression. It can be compared to a car with a defective part that can cause an accident on the road at any time. So it is with feelings. Any uncontrollable impulse can lead to inevitable consequences and troubles in life. Passive aggression directed at oneself can completely destroy the personality. It is important to understand what is the source? Where do these thoughts come from and what ego state is voicing them? Most likely this is your inner critic. You must learn to live with him and not allow him to command you from your own head. It's not you! Take it easy. Emotions themselves are just emotions, you need to learn to recognize them and live without "destroying" yourself or those around you.

Doing only what you want to do and not doing what you don’t want to do

These are 2 of the 6 main rules of life recorded by the popular psychologist Mikhail Labkovsky. According to his method, as soon as everything that we do not like and brings negative emotions disappears from our life, life improves significantly. The editors of the site checked this on themselves and recommends everyone to do it! Think - do you often do in life the way you want? Or do what you want? Not to your wife, husband or your children (boss, parents, etc.)? TO YOU! And only you. Depression can be largely due to the lack of things in life that you love. You have the right to make choices in life in favor of your happiness. Start small - eat your favorite chocolate bar or a packet of chips for lunch, whatever, as long as you want it. Implement this gradually into your life. Say to your desires: "YES!", At least 3 times a day. The world will not collapse. It will definitely not collapse! And joy will appear in your life. And it will help fight depression. We checked! The main thing is not to fall into moral degradation and not start to decay. Avoid this - this is an escape from problem solving.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and complaining about life

There is no need to regret what could have been and what actually does not exist. Continuously complaining about life to others and thinking about how unhappy you are will only exacerbate the situation and increase your depression. You need to learn how to train your blues and not let her take over. You can imagine that sadness and blues are a common cold. We must accept this as a temporary state of the brain. After treatment, the disease will go away.

Identification of the event that influenced the onset of depression

This action is one of the main ones in the fight against depression. An event that, although a thing of the past, continues to whip up heavy thoughts and negatively affects the patient's daily life should not be underestimated. It is necessary to get rid of such a burden and take a fresh look at life and the world around us. You can do this on your own, ask for help from relatives and friends who are aware of this situation. To help in this situation, it is best to contact a psychotherapist and together find a solution to the existing problems.

Improving external living conditions

Sometimes a change of home or living conditions is a sufficient condition for gaining peace of mind. Of course, in order to get rid of depression, it is important to change your internal state, but often any minor changes in life conditions can turn a person's mood in a different direction. Sometimes a person can be burdened by a large number of joint tenants in the house, at the slightest opportunity you need to move and create an acceptable comfort for yourself. Maybe you like pets, then you should have them.

Sometimes work can be depressing and depressed. You can change jobs, you can do your own business, which you have dreamed of for a long time. There are many opportunities to change your occupation, you should not sit and wait for luck to come to you, you need to explore new options, make plans and look for something new.

Nature and clean air, being away from the bustle of the city are often recommended by doctors in the treatment of depression. In such conditions, you can be alone with yourself, analyze the current situation, understand yourself and your feelings. This will help you find peace of mind and find your happiness.

Outcomes

Do not forget about the minor joys in life, which will help in a period of depression, and possibly - and get rid of it. Music, movies, books, healthy sleep, sports and a balanced diet - all this will help you to relax, find peace of mind and peace. However, with a deep form of depression (all about severe depression and its signs - in our article), you still need to seek help from a specialist.

Everyone should read this text - depression can happen to everyone. And here it is important to help - either yourself or a loved one. How to do it correctly - says Natalia Patrakova, who went through all the stages of depression and found harmony with herself.

I think depression should be talked about openly. This text was rewritten several times, corrected and, in general, lay in my drafts for several months. As you might guess, he is very personal. I am no longer afraid to publish it - recently I began to openly talk about it with my friends, and everyone, without exception, though not fully understanding, empathized with me. Why do I consider it necessary to talk about this? Firstly, it was often difficult for my loved ones with me, and they could not do anything about it. Secondly (and this is the main thing), it was often difficult for me with myself, and I, too, could not do anything. I always blamed my character, with which I live and grieve all my life, but I just can't cope with it. But everything turned out to be simpler.

Have you ever thought of someone that he or she is “crazy,” “crazy,” “all in paddocks”? What is your attitude towards such people? Will you initiate a gentle conversation with a friend who suddenly begins to behave aggressively or, conversely, sluggishly? Or would you rather not mess with yourself and withdraw? In our still conservative society, unfortunately, it is customary to condemn and hang labels, and when the phrase "mental disorders" first of all appear white soft walls, straitjackets and restraints on the arms. Meanwhile, anxiety disorders, neurasthenia, apathy live in us for years and are not perceived separately from our personality. What if we found out that many of the problems that are considered part of a bad nature are in fact a physiological feature or a malfunction in the exchange of neurotransmitters, and this can be easily corrected with pills and psychotherapy?

Many are surprised at my openness. And I, on the other hand, wonder why it’s easy to talk about lactose intolerance, diabetes, flu, or a broken finger at dinner with a company, but not mental health. A couple of facts for fans of statistics: depression is a real scourge of our time.

According to various estimates, from 20 to 40% of people in the world are in the stage of depression that requires medical attention. This means that you know such people. Perhaps you yourself are among these people. Think about it: 15% of people with depression commit suicide. This is a really deadly disease.

Depression, by the way, also occurs in animals. And now the good news: this disease is treatable, and quickly and efficiently. Why don't we talk about it and suffer for years? There is no excuse for hushing up this topic. It is for the sake of awareness, for the sake of potential dialogues, that I share my experiences, especially negative ones.

I was diagnosed in early January. To understand my problem, accept it and treat it, I faced a lot of everyday problems, as well as deep misunderstanding on the part of people. Nobody really knows what it is and what to do about it. Consider how overused the word "depression" is and how often it is used with and without it. The first reaction to the phrase about depression is the question: “Because of what? What's happened?" We think that this is some kind of temporary decline in mood caused by objective reasons, some kind of negative experience. Or worse, just a weakness of character. And I want to say that this is a misunderstanding of the term.

My story developed according to the classic scenario. Imperceptibly, all positive feelings began to dull, travel did not catch on, gatherings with friends did not bring joy, work did not bring pleasure. Self-digging was working at full capacity for me, I was constantly analyzing what did not suit me. One by one, I tried to solve the obvious problems. Build relationships, fill free time with new hobbies, generate ideas. It seemed that we would solve this issue with a guy - and everything would be fine. I'll talk to the boss and everything will be fine. I'll stay at home for a while, otherwise I'm tired of traveling - and everything will be fine. I'm tired of sitting at home, now I'll go somewhere - and everything will be fine. It turns out that it is harmful to analyze in this case in a medical sense.

When we try to rationalize negative emotions and do not find an explanation for them, we feel guilt, misunderstanding, and as a result, we unconsciously forbid ourselves to feel. And man is a creature surprisingly balanced by nature. If he cannot experience “bad” emotions, he will no longer have “good” ones.

Everyone is used to thinking about exogenous depression, which is caused by some external factors. Stress at work, illness, problems in personal life - traditionally these are the reasons that come to mind. But in reality, for the first time in many years, there was nothing wrong in my life. Yes, there were some moments that did not suit me, but in general I seemed to have stepped on a white line. Looking back on last spring, I remember the feeling of elation and even, perhaps, happiness.

Nevertheless, by the fall, everything suddenly began to lose its meaning, and dissatisfaction, disappointment and a feeling of heavy everyday life imperceptibly and insinuatingly seeped into life. Now the brightest emotions were negative. Anger, irritation, melancholy, anxiety. If you are prone to mood swings, you can mistake it for your bad temper for a very long time. I thought that I constantly needed adrenaline to make something wrong - only then I live fully, such a difficult person I am. In fact, depression depends on many factors: as much biochemical and genetic factors as it is on lifestyle and traumatic events. The danger of this condition is that it affects the entire body and changes the behavior of a person, his thoughts, feelings. Serotonin metabolism is disrupted, endorphin receptors are degraded, and joy is simply nowhere to be found.

By November, it took me 3-4 hours to at least start planning a working day (by December, these numbers had increased). This time was spent on mental prodding to get out of bed and breakfast. There was no incentive to work, but I considered this problem frivolous until I realized: all the same symptoms have long spilled over into other areas of life. I postponed meetings with friends or even canceled them altogether. In conversations, I could not concentrate on what they were telling me. It was difficult to compose sentences, more often I brushed off monosyllabic phrases. I more and more pretended to listen and understand what the conversation was about, what was interesting to me, funny. It seemed to me that people should understand that my eyes are completely empty. I was annoyed by the closest people, sometimes I could hardly endure being touched, I could start to scandal from scratch, quarrel, break down and cry for hours.

If this is an endogenous depression, it is impossible to determine exactly what exactly triggered its onset. It's like a chicken-and-egg problem: either at first there was a chemical malfunction in the exchange of serotonin, which contributed to the onset of a stressful state, or, on the contrary, some kind of daily stress led to a failure. And then destructive thoughts do their job, closing the circle of depression. My irritation - a frequent symptom - led to conflicts, after which I was covered with a feeling of guilt, then I mentally condemned my own behavior for hours. From which the mood, of course, spoiled even more. I walked in a circle of my paddocks - and the longer, the more it seemed to me that I had made every possible wrong choice. I spent years on the wrong career path, killed the mental strength on unnecessary people in my personal life, did not learn anything, I am not smart enough, not strong enough, not talented enough; no wonder no one really loves me and stuff like that. From time to time, I began to dwell on some mistakes of the past, I could spend days mentally pondering an unimportant situation for a long time.

By mid-December, psychosomatics was already in full swing. At first, the dream "broke". Without the help of melatonin, I could not sleep until seven in the morning and, at best, slept four hours. I was losing weight, although for the first time in my life I stopped denying myself sweets - I tried to cheer myself up with food. But by January, buckwheat and ice cream had become about equally tasteless food for me. There was no appetite - I mostly ate only bread and drank sweet tea to think about something. Taking calls has become a daunting task. I sat for a long time in a cafe for coffee, gathering my strength to just ask for the bill. A couple of times I was able to have fun in companies with the help of alcohol, but after that the feeling of emptiness intensified many times over. Increasingly, when I went out to people, I caught myself thinking that it would be better to stay at home to lie in bed. I literally lost money on the fact that I could not bring myself to call and figure out a particular everyday situation. This plunge into cold death is perhaps the easiest to explain by describing the dementors from the Harry Potter saga. Remember how the heroes felt as if all good things had disappeared from life, the vitality was quickly evaporating and there was only a feeling of hopelessness? Commonly Known Fact: J.K. Rowling invented the Dementors when she was suffering from severe depression.

The reaction of others was predictable. “You’re bothering about idleness, go in for sports / learn spanish / go dancing / go on vacation / hang out at the bar”. There were also complaints like “you think only of yourself, you really feel sorry for yourself, look at my problems, and I’m coping, I would ask how others are doing”. I didn’t want to explain that it’s hard for me even to wash, let alone go in for sports, so I closed myself off and avoided communication. It is believed that willpower is a mandatory attribute of a persistent person, but this is not true. Willpower directly depends on the state of the psyche at a given point in time.

The most useless thing to say to a depressed person is to advise you to pull yourself together and do something. First, if he could, he would have done it already. Believe me, what you can say he has repeated to himself hundreds of times. Secondly, it only makes it worse.

Thus, you devalue the problem, explaining the person's condition by his personal choice, although he did not make it. You are unlikely to tell a diabetic patient “don’t make up and eat sugar”. Rather, you advise him not to forget about regular injections. While, due to the fact that we do not understand what depression is, suffering people are flooded with typical evil thoughts: I am sour like a dirty rag in the sink, I am weak-willed, I am lazy, I am selfish.

My physical condition worsened, as did my indifference to my appearance. I chewed my nails, wore the same thing, didn't wash my face. Shampooing seemed like a daunting task that required several days of preparation. The brain worked worse and worse: I reread work letters for ten minutes before sending them - I no longer trusted myself after several idiotic mistakes. In a stupor, I hung out in front of ATMs, remembering the PIN-code of the card, and even in front of my own entrance, typing the code incorrectly. Birthdays, phone numbers flew out of my head; I was returning home, leaving without a phone or keys; I constantly forgot to put food in the refrigerator at night. Absent-mindedness, which has always haunted me to one degree or another, has reached a new level.

By a happy coincidence, during the same period, as part of broadening my horizons, I leafed through a book on mental disorders and, reaching the chapter on depression, was amazed to find all the symptoms in me. I still had no desire to communicate with people and generally get out of bed, but now a new voice appeared in my head, which consciously noted everything that was happening to me. It's funny, but it was the scientific, as if an outsider, interest in my condition that eventually made me take the next step - to sign up for a psychotherapist.

By the end of the first session, after answering some of the doctor's questions, I was finally overcome with emotion. I realized: I’m not in any way, I feel bad. This confession was my first success. Depression is not about gloomy moods, sobs, and tantrums. This is about the loss of taste for life, about the feeling of falling into a swamp of everyday life. When the disease is at such a stage, it is imperative to voice your loved ones about what is happening to you, no matter how unbearable. You should not be alone with your powerlessness and bad thoughts. The presence of other people will help, if not pull you out of this hole, then at least temporarily solve some everyday problems. When I lay in my children's room for a week, my mother put a tray with different food next to me so that I could at least eat something, and kneaded my back, which ached terribly from being in a fetal position. And the young man, stitching up his studies in distant America, found time for me to make tablets for presentations to shareholders and write macros while I lay in prostration with my eyes closed to the sounds of the next season of the series.

A week before my 25th birthday, I found myself on antidepressants. The bar trips were over - alcohol is prohibited during the bar. The problem with pills is that you have some kind of anticipation that you are about to feel better, but they need 2-3 weeks to take effect. At the same time, after a few days, despite the still negative attitude, the person has energy. On the fifth day of taking antidepressants, I woke up and was finally hungry. The mood was still bad, my tears flowed while the cocoa was heated in the microwave, but I had strength. All day I was rocked from irritation to almost a smile and vice versa, thoughts were noisy in my head and were mostly negative. This is the danger of the first weeks on antidepressants - the likelihood of suicide increases among depressed patients during this period.

My energy turned into anxiety, quick speech, violent gesticulation, I could not sit in one place and nervously circled around the apartment. The world practice in such cases is to prescribe tranquilizers together with antidepressants at the beginning of treatment. However, in Russia, most drugs of this effect are practically equated to drugs. And the permitted light tranquilizers may not work for patients in serious condition. They worked for me, and I started to fall asleep at normal times. A few days later, the appetite began to return.

By the fourth week of drug treatment, I noticed significant improvements. My first few hours in the morning were still hard, but it got easier. Sometimes b O For the most part of the day I felt downright good, felt joy and lightness, and all the more unexpected were the sudden attacks of anxiety and despair in the evening. My mood swings were swinging upward more and more. I slowly began to sing along to the radio, an interest in reading appeared, the working hours passed quite calmly. Then I felt that I was ready to help myself get out of this state. The days in which I woke up with a heaviness in my body and could not get out of bed for a long time gradually became fewer. The work stopped being annoying, I started again initiating various projects to improve the processes and took on more responsibilities. I couldn’t even believe that until quite recently all the numbers looked the same to me, and I spent half an hour making proposals for work letters.

Already recovering, I realized how long I had lived with thoughts typical of depression: I occupy other people's places in all areas of life until someone better appears, and then they will easily forget about me, and in general no one has ever taken me seriously. I was so afraid of being abandoned for something or someone else that I unconsciously provoked conflicts and behaved defiantly so that the end of the relationship would not be unexpected for me. And I never doubted that the end was coming. My consciousness turned everything upside down, putting question marks to all manifestations of love and kind attitude towards me. I considered what was happening around me within my paradigm, based on negative premises - as if the presumption of guilt was applied to everything. The shocking discovery of such a deep degree of self-doubt was a very scary vision.

I could not understand in any way why, why this is happening to me, how and when it started. It seemed to me that the gearbox had stuck, and more and more often I could not switch from the self-destruction mode. But that moment was enlightenment, I realized: this state has nothing to do with who I really am. Just as a deviated nasal septum makes it difficult to breathe freely, so depression prevented my psyche from working normally. Ahead were months of psychotherapy, thematic books and constant work on myself.

Now I am in the process of treatment and am learning to conduct a correct internal dialogue with myself. I already calmly communicate with people, it is easy for me to do things, make plans. To some extent, I was lucky: many do not immediately find their therapist, some try different antidepressants until they start to work. I hit the spot the first time in both cases. And how my life will develop further depends on me. I am no longer ashamed of my emotions, I do not try to suppress them, because they are part of me. Now I am learning to steer them instead of having them steer me. I am not gaining weight from antidepressants (what the forums used to scare me), and the most striking effect of treatment is that my headache has stopped. For many years I suffered from migraines, which sometimes knocked me out of the working regime for several days and which painkillers did not always help, but it turned out that a significant part of these pains were simple psychosomatics. I could not even imagine how the quality of my life would change in the course of psychotherapy, and I only regret a little that I had not dared to do this a few years earlier.

It is important not to get bogged down in self-flagellation, but to improve your erudition. Last April, I ended up at TEDx at the University of Chicago. One of the speakers was a young woman suffering from depression. I remember then I also thought stereotypically, easily hung labels and thought: yes, she looks kind of confused, such people get depressed, and, thank God, I will never understand what she was talking about, I'm funny. What an irony. I reviewed her YouTube talk and a huge number of others dedicated to depression, and saw: how different, how beautiful, intelligent and successful people can suddenly fall off their feet under the weight of a breakdown in neurophysiology. I googled celebrities on depression and saw many interviews of famous, rich and funny people who have been drinking small doses of SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors; antidepressants. - Approx. ed.).

I know very well how difficult it is to recognize in the heap of my thoughts those that spin depression, being just shots into the air. Sometimes the simplest reaction of the psyche is just to go with the flow of obsessions and eventually, of course, sail in the wrong place. My first task was to learn not to ignore the question "so what?" “So what, what's the vacation? So what if breakfast is delicious? So what if I'm next to my loved one? " This question devalues ​​the good. Here you definitely need to answer yourself why “so well”, why it is important, why it’s cool. It is necessary to conduct a constant dialogue with inner negativity in order to prevent it from spreading. You need to learn to stop and be aware that these thoughts have no basis whatsoever. The hard change for me was to begin to accept the unknown, and not to think everything out before the catastrophe - just to know the result. In reality, life does not give us any guarantees. Not that she will be happy, nor that she will be long. Other people will never give us any guarantees either. You need to realize this and learn to live with it.

You need to constantly listen to yourself - this is really important. Celebrate moments that bring joy, even if it’s a small thing. Now I know which hole you can fall into if you don't. In modern society, which is aimed at results, there are often existential crises, because the word "must" has almost replaced the concept of "want". Once it ceases to want, and at the same time it finally ceases to be "must". As my psychotherapist told me, the result in life is always the same for everyone, you can only get pleasure from the process. This may require a complete revision of your goals and priorities. It was typical for me to delve into the past and endlessly talk about the future, in this reasoning reality is lost - what is happening now, in the present.

This is hard work. I can list a few cases when I took on too much in an attack of drug euphoria, and then began to cry immediately after waking up, without getting out of bed all day. Suddenly she fell into despair in the middle of a good day. At these moments, my psychotherapist urged me to slow down, not to give promises to the right and to the left, but to enter social activity slowly. Learn not to waste all the energy at once, but to distribute it in moderation.

Of course, the path to full acceptance of myself for who I am has not yet been traversed. The rethinking of values ​​in one day is most likely obtained only in films with beautiful indie music, while real people have to find the right form of life for a long time. But laziness and powerlessness are not flaws, but bells that urge you to stop and take a break. We always overestimate our own role in the world, and it is hard for us to believe that the planet will not collapse, our company will not go bankrupt, and our loved ones will not cry if we “forget” at work, take a vacation and will only do what we really do for a few days. I want to study.

Loving yourself is even more difficult than loving another person - we know ourselves too well. But it is love for oneself that can and should be unconditional. You can change your environment a thousand times in your life, but the only person who will always be there is you yourself.

First you need to establish a relationship with yourself and stop constantly giving yourself assessments. In moments of misunderstanding, it is better to mentally hug yourself, praise and confess your love, even if in advance. Warm yourself up. Common sense can live only in warmth - I now understand that for sure.