How fast it changes. We cultivate our personality. Rejection of bad habits

We all have a deeply ingrained feeling that we should act and think exactly as we act and think. It is in line with our beliefs or is an expression of them. If there was no conviction, then there would be no manifestation. There is something in us that causes excess weight, leads to bad relationships, failure, poverty, frustration, etc.

How many times have you told yourself: “ I will never do that again! " Despite this statement, you eat cake again, light a cigarette again, be rude to people who are dear to you, etc., although the day has not even ended when you promised yourself not to do this anymore. And yet, we do it.

And then we complicate the problem even more when we angrily say to ourselves: “ You don't have the slightest willpower! " And this makes the overwhelming burden of guilt that we already carry on our shoulders even more difficult. Instead, tell yourself, “ I want to free myself from the hidden desire to be unworthy all the time. I deserve all the best in life, and I allow myself to accept it with love.».

The attitude of many of us to life is primarily a feeling of helplessness. We have long given up on life with its hopelessness and hopelessness. For some, countless disappointments are to blame, for others - constant pain, etc. But the result is the same for everyone - a complete rejection of life and an unwillingness to see yourself and your life in a completely different way. It would be good if you asked yourself the question: "What exactly is causing constant disappointment in my life?" What is it that you are giving away so generously that makes others so annoying? Everything you give, you get back. The more annoyed you are, the more you create situations that annoy you. I wonder if you were annoyed right now reading the previous paragraph? If so, that's great! That's why you need to change! The decision to change Now let's talk about change and our desire to change. We all want our lives to change in better side, but we ourselves do not want to change. Let someone else change, let "they" change, and I will wait. In order to change someone else, you must first of all change yourself. And you have to change internally. We need to change the way we think, the way we speak, and what we say. Only then will there be a real change. Personally, I have always been stubborn. Even when I made the decision to change, this stubbornness got in my way. But I still knew that this was where I needed a change. The more I hold on to any statement, the clearer it is for me that it is from this statement that I need to free myself. And only when you are convinced of this from your own experience, you can teach others. It seems to me that all wonderful spiritual teachers had an unusually difficult childhood, went through pain and suffering, but learned to free themselves, which they began to teach others. Many good teachers constantly work on themselves and this becomes their main occupation in life. Exercise "I want to change" Repeat the phrase “I want to change for the better” as often as possible. As you say this phrase to yourself, touch your throat. The throat is the center where all the energy needed for change is concentrated. And be ready for change when it comes into your life. Know also that if you think that somewhere you cannot change yourself, it is there that you need to change. “I want to change. I want to change. " The forces of the universe will automatically help you in your intention, and you will be surprised to find more and more positive changes in your life. Another exercise Go to the mirror and say to yourself, "I want to change." Pay attention to how you feel. If you find yourself resisting or hesitating, ask yourself why? For God's sake, don't berate yourself, just mark it. Ask yourself, what statement or thought makes you feel this way? You have to dissolve it, no matter. whether you know where you got it from or not. Go back to the mirror, look deeply into your eyes, touch your throat and say loudly 10 times: "I want to free myself from all resistance." Working with a mirror helps a lot. Looking into your eyes and making a positive statement about yourself is the most quick way get nice results.

How can you change? Change your beliefs

Change your beliefs and your life will change ! Our every thought can change! If unwanted thoughts come to you all the time, stop yourself on such thoughts and tell them: "Get out!" Instead, embrace a thought that might bring you good luck. Work on oneself is based on three principles:

• Desire to change.
• Control over the mind.
• Forgiving yourself and others.

We talked about the desire to change for the better, let's talk about controlling the mind. We are all much more than our minds. You probably think that the mind is responsible for everything in your life. But such a belief is based only on the fact that you think so.

Your mind is a tool that can be used this way and that. He is always at your service. Turn off the "chatterbox" in your mind for a moment and think about the meaning of the statement, "your mind is your tool." And you yourself decide how to use it.

The thoughts you choose create all of your life situations... There is incredible power in thoughts and words. And when you learn to control your thoughts and words, you will be in harmony with this power. Don't think that your mind is in control of you. Quite the opposite, you are in control of your mind.

Exercise "release"

Take a deep breath and then exhale all the air. Relax your body. Then tell yourself, “I want to be free. I release all tension. I am letting go of all my old beliefs. I feel calm. I'm at ease with myself. I am in tune with the very process of life. I'm safe".

Repeat this exercise three times. When you think you are in a difficult situation, repeat these phrases to yourself. And then they will become a part of yourself and will be so natural that all the stress and daily struggle will gradually disappear from your life. So relax and think of something good. It’s so easy.

Physical relaxation

Sometimes we need to relax physically. Negative experiences from the situations we find ourselves in and the emotions we experience often remain in our body. One form of physical release from this is as follows: close all windows in the car or at home and scream with all your might. Hitting your pillow or bed as hard as you can is another harmless way.

Doing a variety of sports or taking a brisk walk will lead to the same results. I once experienced a hellish pain in my shoulder that lasted a day or two. I tried not to pay attention, but she didn't disappear. Then I asked myself: “What's going on, what's the matter? What annoys me? " I could not find an answer, so I said to myself: "Well, let's see."

I put two large pillows on the bed and thrashed them as hard as I could. After the twelfth blow, I knew exactly what was annoying me. Everything was clear, and I began to hit the pillows even harder and thus freed myself from the feeling of irritation. When I finished, I felt much lighter, and the next day the pain completely disappeared.

Liberation from the past

Many of my patients say that they cannot be happy now because they have been traumatized in the past. Because they didn't do something that they should have done. Because they do not have more of what they cherished more than anything else. Because they have been hurt and they cannot love; something unpleasant happened earlier, and they remember it. Because once they did something terrible and curse themselves for it. Because they can neither forgive nor forget

To constantly remember your past means to make yourself more painful. Those who are guilty before us do not care. "They" do not even know the extent of our pain. Therefore, there is no point in concentrating your thoughts on the past. It is gone, and it is impossible to change it. But, you can change our attitude to him.

Exercise "freeing from the past"

Let's consider the past only as a memory. If you remember what you wore in third grade, then this memory will be without any emotional assessment. The same can be applied to all events in your past.

As we are released, we become able to use all our mental strength in the present moment. We can change for the better. Again, watch your reaction. What do you need to do for this? How much are you willing or ready to part with your past? What is your resistance level?

Forgiveness

Our next step is forgiveness. Forgiveness is the answer to all questions and concerns. I know from my own experience that when we have problems in life, no matter what kind, it means that we need to forgive someone.

Love- the only answer to any of our problems, and the road to such a state is through forgiveness. Forgiveness dissolves resentment. There are several ways.

Dissolving Resentment Exercise

Sit somewhere in silence, relax. Imagine that you are in a darkened theater with a small stage in front of you. Put on the stage the person you need to forgive (the person you hate the most). This person can be dead or alive, and your hatred can be both lived and present.

When you clearly see this person, imagine that something good is happening to him, what is for this person has great importance... Imagine him smiling and happy. Hold this image in your imagination for a few minutes, and then let it disappear.

Then, when the person you want to forgive leaves the stage, put yourself there. Imagine that only good things happen to you. Imagine yourself happy and smiling. And know that the universe is good enough for all of us.

This exercise dissolves the dark clouds of accumulated resentment. Some people find this exercise very difficult. Every time you do it, you can draw in your imagination. different people... Do this exercise once a day for a month and see how much easier your life becomes.

Visualization exercise

Here's another very good exercise... Imagine yourself as a small child (5-6 years old). Look deeply into this child's eyes. Try to see the deep longing and understand that this longing for love for you. Reach out and embrace this little child, press it to your chest. Tell him how much you love him. Say that you admire his intelligence, and if he makes mistakes, then it's okay, everyone makes them.

Promise him that you will always come to his aid if necessary. Now let the child become very small, about the size of a pea. Put it in your heart. Let him live there. When you look down, you will see his little face and you can give him all your love, so important to him.

Now imagine your mom when she was 4-5 years old, scared and hungry for love. Reach out your hands to her and tell her how much you love her. Tell her that she can count on you no matter what. When she is calm and safe, place her in your heart.

Now imagine your father as a little boy 3-4 years old, he is also very afraid of something and cries loudly, inconsolably. You will see tears rolling down his face like a hail. You now know how to calm young children. Press him against your chest and feel his body trembling. Calm him down. Let him feel your love. Tell him that you will always be by his side.

When his tears are dry, let him become very tiny too. Put it in your heart with you and your mom. Love them all, for there is nothing more holy than love for small children. There is enough love in your heart to heal our entire planet. But let's cure ourselves first. Feel the warmth spreading through your body. Softness and tenderness. Let this precious feeling begin to change your life.

My schedule

My day usually goes like this: when I wake up in the morning, before opening my eyes, I give thanks for everything I have. After a shower, I meditate and pray for about half an hour. Then morning exercises (15 minutes). Sometimes I do gymnastics along with a 6 hour morning program on TV.

My breakfast consists of fruits and herbal tea. Again, I thank Mother Earth for sending me food. Before lunch, I go to the mirror and do the exercises: I either speak or sing them. These are assertions like:

• Louise, you are beautiful and I love you.
• This is the most beautiful day of my life.
• Everything you need to know will come to you.
• Everything is fine.

I usually eat a large salad for lunch. Once again, I bless my food and thank. Somewhere during the day I listen to a tape with statements. For dinner I eat steamed vegetables and porridge. Sometimes chicken or fish. Simple food is best for my body. In the evening I read or study. Going to bed, I mentally recall the past day and bless it. I say I will sleep great and wake up in the morning for a great day. Sounds strange, doesn't it?

How do you start your day? What do you say or think in the morning when you wake up? I remember the time when, when I woke up in the morning, I thought: “My God, we need to wake up again. Another day". And I got exactly the day I imagined it to be. One nuisance after another. Now, before I open my eyes, I thank you for good dream and for all the good things in my life.

About work

Some of us, dissatisfied with the chosen career, constantly think:

• I can't stand my job.
• I hate my job.
• I don't make enough money.
• I am not appreciated at work.
• I just don't know what to do.

These are negative thoughts that cause you a lot of harm. Which way do you think to find Good work if you think so all the time? This is called approaching the problem from the wrong end. If you now have a job that you hate for whatever reason, you need to do the following.

Start by blessing your current job as it is a necessary milestone on your journey. You are now where your life beliefs have taken you. So, start blessing everything about your job: the building in which you work, the elevator, rooms, furniture and equipment, the people you interact with there.

If you want to quit this job, then constantly tell yourself that you are freeing this job with love and giving it to the person who will be happy with it. And know this: in fact, many are striving for the position that you occupy at work.

“I am open and ready to accept a job that would use my capabilities and talents. This new job will allow me to realize all my Creative skills and will satisfy me. " If someone at work bothers you, bless that person every time you think of them.

Although we do not choose this, it is important to know that in each of us there is a little bit of Hitler and of Jesus Christ ... If such a person is critical, imagine him as a person who praises everyone: if he is cruel, tell yourself that he is gentle and fair. If you see only good in people, then they will show you their wonderful qualities, regardless of how they behave with others.

© Louise Hay. Heal your life. The power is within us. - M., 1996

It is incredibly difficult to become a completely "new" person, but if you feel that you are not fully reaching your potential and are living the wrong way, then dramatic positive changes can be the best way out. If you want to change completely, you first need to honestly assess your current weaknesses and get an idea of ​​the desired personality traits. You need to set short-term and long-term goals, find a role model to help you move in the right direction, and periodically assess the situation to stay on track.

Steps

Part 1

1. Determine how much you want change. Just think, "Do I want to change?" For radical change, it's important to make sure you really want it. Assess every aspect of your life and consider if you want to change them.

   • Assess the direction in which your life is heading.
   • Understand what activities need to be changed.
   • Be mindful of the effort and sacrifice required.
   • If you do not believe that you are able to change all aspects, then your venture is doomed to failure.

2. Determine how much change is possible. If you are convinced that you want to change, you need to find out how much you can. Sit down and consider if you have what it takes to make these changes in your life.

   • the ability to change is needed;
   • need tools for change;
   • it takes time to change;
   • support of loved ones is necessary.

3. Assess yourself soberly. It is important to be completely honest with yourself when you assess yourself. If you “paint” an inaccurate portrait, you will never understand what prevents you from changing yourself.

   • Ask peers. If the look from the outside does not correspond to your ideas about yourself, then you are not completely frank.
   • Assess the decisions you have to make and the reasons for those decisions. After that, you will realize that you have found yourself in the present situation precisely because of such reasoning. You will need to make decisions in accordance with a new way of thinking in order to change completely.
   • For example, if you decide to stay at home instead of meeting friends, evaluate the reasons for this choice and how they characterize you.

4. Write down the result. Set and write down the ultimate goal of this process. The goal should be measurable. It can consist of several aspects or represent a global picture. Either way, the goal should be visible to give you the motivation you need every day.

   Part 2

   Find a role model

   1. Learn from the best. Anyone can be a role model: young people and adults, friends, relatives, strangers, or celebrities. Find someone who truly is the person you want to become. Perhaps you will like the look of one person and the actions of another. Use the desired aspects of different people for inspiration.

      • If you know each other, then make an appointment to chat. Find out their way of thinking.
      • Gather information if you are not familiar with the person. Find out everything you can find in the media, and try to try on the qualities of such a person in everyday life.

   2. Connect with the right people. Surround yourself positive people even more important than finding a role model. Being close to a person, you have the opportunity to repeat his actions. Find people who have similar goals or have already achieved them, and connect with them.

      • For example, if you want to become a more outgoing person, then surround yourself with the same people. If you want to be financially successful, hang out with financially successful people.
      • Avoid people who negatively influence your changes. If you strive to lead more healthy image life, it is difficult to always be near those who sit a lot and often eat junk food.

   3. Find someone to follow your progress. He will not let you go astray. In response, you can offer similar help. Choose a person with whom you can contact at any time if it is difficult for you. It is also recommended that you hold weekly meetings by phone or in person to discuss your progress and achievements.

      • Best of all, if you are controlled by the same role model. Such a person knows exactly what effort it takes to achieve the desired result, so he will be extremely useful to you.

Friends, if you ask yourself a question from time to time, how to change yourself, then this article is for you!

Today we will talk about how to make the life that each of us has today was more joyful, more pleasant, more positive. So that there is less struggle, less difficulty, less overcoming.

In general, the conversation will be about what to do when everything goes wrong, but you want everything to change.

The main condition for how to change yourself and your life is action.

Basically, we do nothing, we just sit and suffer. We do not change anything, but only wait for everything around us to change itself.

This is mistake! You can only change yourself.

Change yourself - and the world around you will change

This axiom is as old as the world, everyone has heard and knows it.

But HOW can you change yourself?

HOW to change your life?

WHAT SPECIFICALLY need to be done for this?

Step one. Remove your fear

The first thing to do is to get rid of the fear within yourself.

Fear of life changes- this is a stumbling block, this is the main reason why people do nothing to change themselves and their lives.

There are many techniques and techniques for dealing with your own limitations and fears. Here is one of them:

Step two. Select the area to change

Take a piece of paper and write a list of the directions in which you want to change.

For example:

• Career
• Personal relationships
• Money
• Figure
• Friends
• Spiritual development

Take a close look at the list and listen to your inner feelings. What areas of your life do you want to change the most? Which direction can you call "burning"?

Select ONE item from the list and stop there. Your task is to achieve success in this direction. This success will then automatically lead to changes in other areas of your life.

Step three. Change your beliefs

You need to identify your negative and destructive beliefs and attitudes in the chosen area and replace them with positive and constructive ones.

If you have problems with a certain area of ​​life - this means only one thing - in your Subconscious there are negative programs and attitudes in this direction and your main task is to neutralize and replace them.

The best way to do this is affirmations.

• Create for yourself (instructions in the article above) or apply existing affirmations in your direction
• Use different ways working with positive affirmations (reading, writing, repeating, audio)
• Do affirmations regularly for 21 to 40 days in a row

If you do everything right, then after 40 days you will notice the first changes in your chosen area. Changes at a deep level will inevitably lead to changes in the outside world. Fresh thoughts and ideas or suggestions will come to you. The world around you will begin to change.

Take action immediately! Do not sit idly by! Remember that nothing will happen in your life from one repetition of affirmations! Only your ACTIONS in the chosen direction can change you and your life!

The master will tell you in more detail about the "technology of self-change" positive psychology, famous writer and trainer Alexander Sviyash.

How to change yourself? Alexander Sviyash

And at the end of our article, I bring to your attention useful tips from a practicing psychologist. They will help you to carry out the process of "self-transformation" faster and easier.

• Ask yourself questions

Ask yourself:

Why should I change myself?

Is this my wish or my loved ones?

What will I gain and what will I lose when I change?

And try to answer them as honestly as possible. And only after making sure of the need for personal change, proceed to the practical steps.

• Keep a diary

Create a Personal Change Diary for yourself and write down all your successes and failures, problems and achievements in the area you are changing. A change diary will help you organize your thoughts and put things in order in your head. He teaches you to self-discipline and responsibility in business and also allows you to analyze and correct your actions.

The diary must be personal! Do not show it to anyone and keep it away from prying eyes.

• Imagine the end result

Visualize every day - imagine yourself already changed - try to see yourself as you dream of becoming. Your appearance ... your habits ... your thoughts ... your environment ...

Create in your imagination a clear and clear picture of your future Self and scroll it as often as possible on the inner screen, filling with the emotions of joy and happiness from what you see! We are what we think ...

• Stop criticizing yourself

If something does not work out for you, you do not need to scold yourself. Otherwise, your negative reaction can create in the Subconscious Mind a negative attitude towards refusal to complete the task. In other words, it can get scared and stop acting. Remember - not everything comes at once, Moscow was not built right away. And your self-esteem and attitude towards yourself does not depend on the fact that something does not work out.

• Praise yourself!

Reward yourself for every successful action you take, no matter how small, with good words and gifts! Praise yourself! Love yourself! Feel the delight and joy of every successful action or step! Positive emotions will charge you and give you new strength for successful movement along the path of self-development.

Friends, answers to the question, how to change yourself enough. The main thing is to start changing. Start taking real steps to change yourself and your reality. And the world around you will not last long - it will definitely change! Once you change yourself for the better, you will make your life better forever!

Positive changes for you!

Arthur Golovin

Interesting

Almost any woman sooner or later comes across the realization that she is not satisfied with everything in her appearance. Of course, every woman may want to see the “best version of herself” in the reflection of the mirror, and if you also have such a desire, then we suggest that you familiarize yourself with some recommendations.

How to change your appearance to a girl, where to start

How to change beyond recognition

How to change in a month - action plan

How to transform quickly and inexpensively

What can you change in yourself if you have already tried everything

To transform yourself for the better - do not rush to experiment

Is it realistic to outwardly become a different person in 1 day

Hello dear friends! I am often asked: "Anya, here you are engaged in self-development, doing something constantly ... And where should I start changing my life?" Of course, I often answer this question in different ways, based on the individual qualities of the interlocutor. There are many approaches. In this article, you will find a list of the main 16 points. Where you start from is not really that important.

Your very Intention to Act is important! Do not think, do not plan, but ACT!

Short prehistory

Is there a chance for a greenhouse rose to grow wild and not break? Most likely, a delicate plant will have to be overgrown with good thorns, learn to survive in conditions of a minimum of water and heat, otherwise death threatens. Well, if the flower, among other things, begins to scold itself for the "wrong" color of the petals, insufficiently beautiful aroma or too thin stems, nothing good will come of it.

Do you get the gist of the analogy? A person without an inner core (or self-confidence) is the same rose that in real life will have to fight for their existence, growing sharp teeth. Only the strongest can win, who is not afraid to take risks, to prove himself true, who is ready to take responsibility for his life and goals.

Complexes and internal indecision create fear, making a person vulnerable. That is why you need to develop self-confidence. And below we will tell you how to do it right and how to start changing your life!

How to develop self-confidence or where to start changing your life: 16 helpful tips

1. We work on external manifestations of insecurity

We change the image

Take a close look at your image in the mirror and think about what you wanted to change for a long time, but did not dare? Are you satisfied with your hairstyle and clothing style? A correctly chosen image will not only emphasize the dignity of the figure, but will work wonders of self-perception.

Don't try to change your style yourself. This is not very effective! Seek help from stylists or acquaintances with good taste.

Learning to speak beautifully

What separates confident people from notorious losers? The manner of speech.

Hard? Sign up for a public speaking course.

Keep your posture straight

When a person slouches, he sends signals on a non-verbal level to environment who do not speak in his favor.

Keep your back straight, you will be surprised how much this will affect your well-being and mood!

2. Changing behavior habits

Turn on activity mode

Rather than sitting within 4 walls and seizing low self-esteem with a bucket of ice cream, isn't it better to work on yourself?

Sports, travel, learning new skills and creative dedication are great reasons to be proud, filling life with meaning.

Making new acquaintances

The wider the circle of contacts, the more influence and power we have, we can get support for our ideas and opportunities in time.

It is important to learn to establish contacts, build a positive conversation and not be afraid to open up when meeting.

You will find some tips on how to make new acquaintances in our article.

We are engaged in self-education

A good strategy for strengthening the inner self is constant development. Strength is not only in the muscles, but also in practical application knowledge that can be gleaned from books, scientific journals or refresher courses.

Mastering public speaking skills

Speaking in front of a large number of people - in meetings, lectures, presentations, etc. - is a good practice for building self-confidence.

Don't be afraid to be the first to speak, ask clarifying questions, or act as a spokesperson for your team.

We help the weak

Kindness and mutual assistance are great ways to boost self-esteem. Don't be afraid to lend a helping hand to those who are weaker.

The generosity of the soul is real strength! Helping those in need, we feel that we are worth something in this life, which means that we do not live in vain.

3. Mastering the basics of goal setting

We define goals and life principles

If a person does not have principles, it is easy to use him, after all, he himself does not know by what criteria to evaluate himself. Decide why you came to this world? What are you living for, what kind of people do you want to see next to you?

We focus on solutions

Rather than whining about how bad everything is around, and how many problems have piled up, it is better to reorient energy to solving the problem. Not "life is bad" or "I'm lazy", but "how to make life more interesting" and "where to get the energy to fight."

Approaching dreams realistically

You can set yourself an unattainable ideal and immediately give up, losing all desire to fight. Or you can draw real goals and gradually implement your plans, each time congratulating yourself on a new victory. The second option has a positive effect on your self-esteem.

Learning to praise yourself

You should not wait for recognition of merits from the outside, the main critic is yourself. It's time to learn not only to scold yourself for laziness and failure, but also to praise your achievements. Celebrate another victory with a trip to the restaurant or on a vacation, you deserve it.

4. Setting the correct internal attitude

Re-discovering ourselves

To defeat internal complexes and strengthen weaknesses, you need to get to know yourself! Start keeping a journal of your thoughts and feelings. Analyze everything that happens to you during the day, look for the roots of fears in the distant past. This will help you understand how to change behavior for the better, become more confident and look at life events in a new way.

We cultivate our personality

Limiting beliefs, stereotyped thinking, living according to social stereotypes - all this only reinforces low self-esteem. Stop following the herd, it's time to open your true self, learn to think for yourself and act without regard to the opinion of the majority. There is no point in trying to please everyone, you are unique!

Mastering meditation practices

Why is meditation good? It helps to relax and find a state of harmony. The noise of the city blocks the true desires of the soul, the bustle around does not allow us to know ourselves, to figure out where we are going and what we want. To acquire inner knowledge, Confidence in your path helps meditation.

Working with thinking

By changing the way we think, we can change our lives. It is very important not to forget to learn to look at positive points their actions, to find the bright side in negative things. After all, what we focus on is what we get!

Don't be afraid to change the rules of the game, grow and rediscover the world - this will help you become more self-confident by rewriting the book of your life in a new way.

That's all! All the best to you!